this fight
this loss
this game refusing to be played
that leaves holes in our hearts
if not holes in our lives
there are others
filling gaps
spilling drinks
naming names
but today I am sad
to have lost you
though life has changed
those frizzy haired girls
camp counselors
with big smiles
to the women we no longer know
it maybe for the best
that our paths no longer cross
life is not incomplete
lonely
or lacking
but my eyes hurt today
and pride has fallen to dust
as I think of what life would be like
if it wasn’t by choice
that we are not friends
beautiful.